| E.M.T ~ Nothing in it.
Endotracheal
Tube ~ Currently out of stock.
Enema ~ [1]Not a friend. [2] Rapper's
mother.
Episiotomy ~ Usually avoidable surgery to make the doctor feel
better.
Exfoliated ~ catheter removed. Factor 8 ~ 8th qualifying
heats for the X-factor.
Fallopian tube ~ Part of a television set.
Fetus ~ A character in "Gun Smoke".
Fluid Balance ~
Carrying drinks across the bar without spilling a drop.
Florence Nightingale
~ Italian stopover marred by stormy weather. Ganglion ~ Big cat with
long limbs and poor coordination.
Gastrectomy ~ Relief of wind.
Geriatrics
~ German illusionists.
G.I. ~ A soldier.
Glasgow Coma Scale
~ Scottish alcohol intake ratings.
Glazed Expression ~ Occupational
disease of window cleaners. Hangnail ~ Coat hook.
Heroin
~ Nurse who can face another shift without narcotic support.
Hernia
~ She's too close for comfort.
Hickman Line ~ Railway used by out of
town yokels.
High Dependency Unit ~ Facility for addiction to extreme
mountaineering.
H.O.H ~ A prostitute.
Homeopathy ~ Sympathetic
to the challenges faced by the gay community.
Hospital Porter ~ Health
service's own-brand ale.
Human Resources ~ bank for transplantible organs.
Hydration
~ What anorexics do with their food.
Hypotension ~ Not tight enough.
Hypertension ~ [1] Too tight. [2] A period of high anxiety.
Hysterectomy
~ Removal of overexcited woman. Impotent ~ Distinguished, well known.
Influenza
~ Occupational disease of chimney sweeps.
INR ~ Me and she.
Iritis
~ Grammatically-challenged claim of infallibility.
Iron Defficiency
~ Letting the laundry pile up again.
Irritable Hip ~ Frustrated flower
child
IVI ~ Climbing plant that favours walls and ancient structures. Joules
~ Someone’s name. Kg ~ A container of beer. Labor Pain
~ Getting hurt at work.
Laparoscope ~ Instrument for detecting Eskimaux.
Sorry, Innuits.
Lens ~ It belongs to Leonard.
Luer Lock ~
Washroom security device. | 
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